6 months

Manel is 6 months old today. I can’t believe how fast these months went by and how he’s grown. He’s starting to sit up straight, he now eats solids 3 times a day and he’s starting to mimic us.

It seems like just yesterday I was finally getting the go ahead to start trying to conceive again, the horrible nightmare was finally over and we could regain control of our life. A year had passed since the words “this is not a normal pregnancy” had nearly destroyed me, and we were finally free.
It took us (only) 6 months to conceive M after that, but somehow it always feels like it took us almost 2 years, because that’s how long we had been planning and wanting him. Those were the longest and darkest 2 years of our life.

But you know what? Something I never thought would happen, did. Time healed those wounds. There are scars of course, but the wounds healed, and you end up forgetting about the scars most of the time. I thought I would never be the same person again, I thought something inside me had broken forever; I thought I’d never spend a day without thinking about it and mourning the loss of what could have been. But the fact is I was wrong. I do spend days, weeks, even months, when I don’t think about it. And I am the same person I was before, optimist, hopeful, intrinsically happy. And that’s because I am where I wanted to be in life; I have two beautiful children and a wonderful husband. Life has been generous indeed.