Not home yet
The house is not ready yet. They say it will be ready tomorrow but the way things are going I’m just not sure I believe them. We are planning on having the cleaning company come in by the end of the week so I’m just praying that the house is ready by then.
Meanwhile, we are staying at the beach house since yesterday, which means we have a one hour commute to work every day this week. R stays at the beach with one of my SILs and next week we’ll be on vacation again.
I am so used to walking to work everyday it’s killing me to have to wake up an hour earlier and drive to work. I had forgotten how much I hate traffic, particularly in the morning.
My mom is giving me a hard time because I haven’t started preparing for the baby yet, I haven’t bought anything and I haven’t even opened the boxes with R’s clothes to see what is usable. I know I’m only 27 weeks along and have plenty of time and I know I’m not even home so there is no way I could do these things even if I wanted to. And I told her all that.
But the fact is that I can’t help feeling a little guilty. When I was 27 weeks along with R I had almost everything ready, her room was all done and I had tons of clothes all washed up and folded in her drawer. This time, I feel almost like I’m neglecting this baby, and it’is preventing me from bonding with him like I should be doing.
Maybe it was all a big mistake to have the bathrooms remodelled now and to go on vacation instead of staying home preparing for the baby. But at the same time I don’t think it would be fair to R not to fully enjoy my last summer alone with her.
Anyway, what is done is done. Now let’s just hope the house is ready and clean by the time we come back from the beach house so we can finally settle in and start nesting.
posted by Ana @ 11:57 AM
3 Comments:
At 10:54 AM,
Lioness said…
Oh mothers... Seriously, there's nothing like mothers, for the good and the bad.
Ana, your life has been turned upside down w the molar pregnancy, then the miscarriage, the transplant, your grandfather dying, the new pregnancy which you didn0t even know if it was going to be all right - you are doing exactly what needs to be done for you and yours, and therefore it is the right decision. Mothers may know almost everything but your mother doesn't know what works for your family, YOU do. You will have enougt time to do whatever still needs to be done, no worries! Enjoy your single child for now, you are absolutely right.
[Have you tried the "Yes, Mother" approach? Sometimes they only need to feel involved and that we still listen to them. No eye-rolling though, that defeats the whole thing!]
At 1:39 PM,
Anonymous said…
Ah, the mommy guilt! I must admit, I was horrible at preparing for either baby. W/ Sarah I was in grad school and finals were more important than getting things ready. We bought a changing table pretty quick, but didn't buy a crib until Sarah was 4 weeks old (guest room was needed for grandparents first, then it could become the baby room).
Sydney, I was busy w/ Sarah and setting up a new house (we moved when I was 19 week prg).
You know, I never really bonded in-utereo - but I had no problem once they are on the outside.
Hugs - enjoy your remodel, enjoy your time with R. The baby will have his (or her) time with you when the time is right. That's what midnight feedings are for! BONDING.
As for mom - you are right, I am behind schedule. (then do what you want!!!!!!!)
Kirsten
At 7:22 PM,
Modokker said…
Ana don't feel bad. Honestly you'll get to it soon when you can and it will stil be special even more so as you go thru R things and think about all your memories of her as a baby. You bond with your son the moment you see him and forever after that. HUGS! I think your mom is just excited and probably wants to help you!
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