And then I get slapped across the face

Last night on the news there was this piece on infertility (thanks Johnny for the tip). The problem seems to be increasing in Portugal, as it is in all developed countries (they call Portugal a developed country, just to give an otherwise gruesome piece a little bit of humour).
They interviewed 3 infertile women, 2 still fighting and one who is currently pregnant with IVF twins.

This piece was focused mainly on the costs of infertility treatments in private clinics. Because there are public hospitals who do fertility treatments for free, if you are willing to wait at least 3 years. Assuming you have waited at least 1 or 2 years to realise you needed treatment in the first place, waiting another 3 is obviously not reasonable. So some of these women give everything they have (and don't have) to private clinics. One of them had her house for sale so she could afford her first IVF. And what if she needs a second one, or even a third one?

I can't begin to described how I felt after seeing this. As I was waiting for this piece to come on (after one and half hours of torture watching news about football, politics and pedophilia) I was expecting to feel sorry for myself, to think about all I have been through this past year. But I didn't. The pain I saw in these women's faces and heard in their shivering voices made me completely forget about my own struggle. All I could do was silently scream over and over again "God, if you have another child planned for me, please, please give it to her. Please".

Because I have a child you see. And not only that, I have a child who was concieved naturally, after 4 months of being off BCP, and who was born after an uneventfull and worryless pregnancy. I have been blessed, so immensely blessed.
Granted I have had some major setbacks since then, I lost two pregnancies and have been trying for #2 for over a year now. But I know I can get pregnant, and I get pregnant from sex, imagine that! I'm 25 and I have a beautiful daughter. I know I will have more children, there's no reason to believe I won't. But even if I don't, I will never ever know what it is like to spend years longing for a child, not knowing if you can even get pregnant, putting all your emotional and financial efforts in a battle that you may just lose in the end. I should be more grateful of what I was given.